Happy New Year (Resolution/s)!
(An article by Vinita Kinra, Editor, GAT)
After the high-calorie indulgence of holidays, there’s a craving for careful moderation. After the near obsession with gifts and material enticements, there’s a need for conscious restraint. And after the blaring, high-decibel music of New Year’s Eve, there’s an inner calling for quiet contemplation.
Now that we’ve eaten more than our intestines can absorb—from turkeys to mashed potatoes to puff pastries to rum cake—and drank enough liquor to whet our appetite and wet the toilet, and danced enough to loud DJ parodies under flashing disco lights, let’s circle some days on the clean January, 2015 calendar with our New Year resolutions.
Obviously, January will have the most circles, enough to make several pearl strings. Right from diet plan kick offs to new gym membership day, this cold winter month will be hot with activity, or let’s call it desired activity, leaving some legroom for most enthusiasts who would slack off after mid January rolls around.
By February, the paint on pledges is peeling and lacklustre, and talks focus more on the forthcoming March break, announcing spring and celebrating mild temperatures outdoors with or without family.
By the time the summer sun climbs the sky to glow with its warm smile, it’s already too late. Bellies are bulging, thighs are thunderous, waistlines have gone to waste and hips compete with hippos. If we do muster the courage to slip on that flimsy summer dress, we look like the cotton-stuffed dolls our grannies used to make with a string tied in their middle to separate the belly from the rest of the body.
Losing weight is not the only typical New Year’s resolution. Some of the other favourites include quitting drinking or smoking or eating healthy.
However, it would be unfair to conclude this discussion without mentioning the quirky ones:
I will shower more instead of using a good deodorant;
I will not suck in my belly and hold my breath to look slim in front of a cool dude or babe. Instead, I’ll buy a mint mouth freshener;
I will not scribble my New Year resolutions on toilet tissue and flush it upon the first urge.